OK, so the majority of us have an idea of what "dating" is. However, I think that the art of dating has somewhat degenerated from its former glory (presuming there was a former glory). After mulling over this topic with a few other "daters", I've decided to post a few rules for the dating population, to help turn around this sad, sad state of affairs.
1. Call me, don't text me. Simply, if you have two minutes to form coherent sentences on a phone, those two minutes could be spent actually asking me how my day was and hearing my voice. And if you don't like hearing my voice, that's probably the first problem.
2. There is no "hanging out". There is no "kicking it". Ask me out on a real date (explained in depth in #3) which does not consist of your couch and take out, unless you've managed to concoct a picnic and candles and were planning on making it, gasp, romantic. But really, first dates should NOT be at your place (if you have your own place).
3. Take me out on a REAL date. To clarify (since this probably NEEDS the most clarification):
a) Call me with a plan. Not, "Uh, I don't know, what do you think?" You have just lost points. Where, when. Take charge.
b) Pick me up. No, don't ask to meet me somewhere, are you kidding? Drive to my house, knock on the door (do NOT text or call me from your car), and open my door. Maybe this sounds like too much, but if you like me, it shouldn't be so hard to pull a door handle for 2 seconds of your life.
c) Take me out. It could be dinner. It could be dancing (NO, not a club). Be inventive. But go somewhere. IN PUBLIC. It's always nice to know you are not being hidden away.
d) Pay for dinner. Or whatever your "plan" happens to be. I know, I know, archaic as it sounds, and feminists everywhere are probably growling at me, but damn it, I should not have to be pulling out my wallet, and you should not be looking at me salty. It's only cute if I pay when we are both rich (i.e. think Tamia).
e) Take me home and walk me to the door. And don't look all dejected if you don't get inside the house. Take it from Janet, "Let's wait awhile".
4. Introduce me to people you care about. If you care about me and are trying to integrate me into your life, this should not be so hard. I doubt you have one friend and that just happens to be your roommate. If you like me, include me. If not, stop wasting both our valuable time.
5. The "honeymoon phase" should be the "honeymoon phase". Essentially, if you REALLY like me and are trying to win me over, shouldn't those first few months be great and happy and you not being able to get enough of hanging, talking, being around me? So, if the "honeymoon phase" is phone calls that go unanswered or days when we don't talk and that's supposed to be the BEST part of this, ummm, yeah, not so enticing.
So there are the first five to get all us "daters" started. Together, we CAN make a difference!
Enjoy, Annette
1. Call me, don't text me. Simply, if you have two minutes to form coherent sentences on a phone, those two minutes could be spent actually asking me how my day was and hearing my voice. And if you don't like hearing my voice, that's probably the first problem.
2. There is no "hanging out". There is no "kicking it". Ask me out on a real date (explained in depth in #3) which does not consist of your couch and take out, unless you've managed to concoct a picnic and candles and were planning on making it, gasp, romantic. But really, first dates should NOT be at your place (if you have your own place).
3. Take me out on a REAL date. To clarify (since this probably NEEDS the most clarification):
a) Call me with a plan. Not, "Uh, I don't know, what do you think?" You have just lost points. Where, when. Take charge.
b) Pick me up. No, don't ask to meet me somewhere, are you kidding? Drive to my house, knock on the door (do NOT text or call me from your car), and open my door. Maybe this sounds like too much, but if you like me, it shouldn't be so hard to pull a door handle for 2 seconds of your life.
c) Take me out. It could be dinner. It could be dancing (NO, not a club). Be inventive. But go somewhere. IN PUBLIC. It's always nice to know you are not being hidden away.
d) Pay for dinner. Or whatever your "plan" happens to be. I know, I know, archaic as it sounds, and feminists everywhere are probably growling at me, but damn it, I should not have to be pulling out my wallet, and you should not be looking at me salty. It's only cute if I pay when we are both rich (i.e. think Tamia).
e) Take me home and walk me to the door. And don't look all dejected if you don't get inside the house. Take it from Janet, "Let's wait awhile".
4. Introduce me to people you care about. If you care about me and are trying to integrate me into your life, this should not be so hard. I doubt you have one friend and that just happens to be your roommate. If you like me, include me. If not, stop wasting both our valuable time.
5. The "honeymoon phase" should be the "honeymoon phase". Essentially, if you REALLY like me and are trying to win me over, shouldn't those first few months be great and happy and you not being able to get enough of hanging, talking, being around me? So, if the "honeymoon phase" is phone calls that go unanswered or days when we don't talk and that's supposed to be the BEST part of this, ummm, yeah, not so enticing.
So there are the first five to get all us "daters" started. Together, we CAN make a difference!
Enjoy, Annette
1 comment:
1. Call me, don't text me.
This is a big one for me! I think that communicating by texting (and IMing) is way too casual for romance. On the guy's part, it's emotionally lazy because he doesn't have to stress about things like what he'll say or whether the girl will sound happy to hear from him. Whenever I give a new guy my number and he texts me, I just don't respond. Usually he'll call later anyway, and ask if I got his text. In the friendliest, flirtiest tone possible, I'll say "oh, I'm just not a big texter. I'm old fashioned." I find that masculine men who enjoy pursuing and really like you will call if that's what it takes to get a hold of you.
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